Saturday, October 26, 2013

I HAVE A DATE YOU GUYS

*giggles*
No but this is serious. I'm not going to be a little kid about this.
*suppressed giggles*
NO NO I AM AN ADULT THIS IS WHAT ADULTS DO WAIT HOW IS THIS MY LIFE I AM GOING ON A DATE WITH A BOY TO A RESTAURANT ALAJSOUNTWEUTHSLKJDTBOEBALTHAODNF:UWNE:OTUH

I should mention that I am still not 100% sure if I like this guy, I mean like no, I like him as a person and we have really good conversations and stuff, but I'm still not entirely sure I like him in a way where I want to date him. But clearly he likes me that way, because he's the one who asked me out in the first place.

Before you ask, no, this isn't Orchid. Actually Orchid still seems pretty cool but like dude I know literally nothing about you beyond the fact that you're in engineering. It was Grag. God, that's a stupid nickname. I need to change that. For now, uh... well... uh... yeah I really need to come up with a new nickname. ANYWAY IT WAS VERY AWKWARD AND ALSO I GOT VERY FLUSTERED. I have never actually been asked out on a date before, despite the fact that technically I "dated" someone in high school, and just like omg you guys it was so sad. I look back now and I'm pretty sure he tried to ask me out like 2 different times, once before class, and once about 20 seconds before he had to say "Do you want to go on a date" because seriously you guys, you have to be blunt with me. I am not good at picking up on subtle cues. I hate them. Just say what you mean already.
And by "subtle cues" I mean he said he was 22 (which is a major plot twist because I totally thought he was 18 so like my brain is still adjusting to this knowledge) and he was like "so it probably wouldn't be that weird if we went out" and I totally missed that, omg.

The thing is, since I've been telling people (who are not Vince who I think is still more excited than me) they keep asking "Is he cute?" and I'm like "Uhhhhhh...... not.... really...." I mean like... just..... like .... he has potential, I guess? I dunno, but I'm not really physically attracted to him at all so this date should be interesting. I'm really hoping he doesn't wear sweatpants, given that he wears them every other time I see him and it's just sad like omg dude you are a real adult why are you wearing teenager pants all the time.
Like okay on campus it's more understandable (even though I'd never wear sweatpants on campus like ever but I see other people doing that from time to time) but srsly I am pretty sure one of the cardinal rules of first dates is that you don't wear sweatpants. Unless the date requires that, but I'm not really sure what you'd have to be doing to require sweatpants... working out? Ugh. No, but I'm pretty sure going on a first date to a restaurant in sweatpants is like... no. I figure if he shows up in sweatpants, I'll be like "ugh do you even own real pants" like in a jokey sort of way and if he shows up in real pants, I'll be like "oh so you do own real pants"so like either way it's all good.

Well, it's tomorrow and I have to study for chem right now (ugh I don't want to UGH NO I WAS UP UNTIL 11 LAST NIGHT WRITING A PAPER NOOOOOOOOOOOO) but obvi I will put up how it went and all that. After telling Vince all the details, because she ships us (even though it may not turn out to be a thing) and I'm guessing she'll want to know. I did give her a play-by-play of how he asked me out, so.... yeah.


Okay, on a more somber note, I had a weird dream last night. It had to do with all those horrible boys from middle school ("The Blunder Boys", as a friend and I called them). They showed up at some... garage or something where I was with my family (only they looked really weird. It's hard to imagine how people will look once they've grown up) and I was like "ugh just ignore them" and I was all super cool I-don't-give-two-shits-about-you-little-shits and then for some reason they were like "what's the big deal" and I was so mad, I was like "Are you serious, you treated me like shit, you were so horrible to me, you ruined middle school for me, you were so mean I can't believe you" and then they fucking apologized.
I cannot tell you how happy that made me.
It's like, they finally realized what they did was shit and knew that they had to say sorry to me because it was the right thing to do and I was just so happy, like oh my god, you turned into decent people who have tried to right your wrongs.
I'm not gonna lie, I was pretty disappointed when I woke up and found out it was just a dream. Of course that would never happen in real life, I'd never get a genuine apology. And that's fucking fine. I mean getting an apology would be fantastic, but not getting an apology is fantastic too because it means I don't have to see them ever again. So either way, life is good, my friends. AND I STILL HAVE A DATE. Someone still thinks I'm cute enough and funny enough and nice enough to ask out. Honestly.

Shit, now I have half an hour before I need to go down to eat and then rush off to a presumably 2-hour alberta-sat meeting. I meant that still gives me loads of time to study chem later, and I guess jot down some ideas for my philosophy paper since I want to have at least some idea of what I'm writing by Monday. Next weekend I have to write a draft of my English paper and write up a bio lab, too... ugh I still have to do a chem pre-lab and bio lab statistics and then START the fucking write up and just like AAAAAH WHY IS EVERYTHING HAPPENING AT THE SAME TIME FUCKING HELL. I need better time management. Tomorrow at this time I have to already BE at the diner. ugh why am I so bad at life today.

I guess I keep forgetting that I do have time to do homework throughout the week, too. I don't need to do it ALL right now. Like monday after chem I could just bury myself in the nice library and study for chem until like 6 and then rush home for dinner. I'm so nervous about chem. It's so hard now. I miss 11th grade chem, when everything was easy and I got 100% on pretty much all my lab write-ups. Shit I bet they pitched all those lab write-ups. DAMN THAT JUST MADE ME SAD I WORKED HARD ON THOSE.

okay srsly time to be a grownup. Sigh.

yer pal,
swegan :)

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