Sunday, October 6, 2013

Wat

The
FUCK

Okay so I know last time my roommate brought a guy back they just ended up talking (apparently they had been dancing together most of the night), but then this morning I heard a male voice. So I opened the door and hers was open only a crack and I could hear a guy's voice. They were just chatting, laughing about things, talking about people or something. I couldn't tell whose voice exactly, but... let's just say I'm kind of a mess in terms of this whole crush thing this weekend b/c Friday night got me all wound up.

I don't want to be a jealous green monster and honestly I could kind of tell who it didn't sound like but shit I don't know. So I went out to throw something away, hoping she'd be like "oh that's my roommate" and, y'know, TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON. But nope. She's gone, he's gone, everyone's gone. Brunch doesn't start for another 25 minutes so I don't have an explanation.

Guh. I hate not knowing what's going on. I'm so confused and just... 25 more minutes and I can go downstairs and eat. and then after that I'll get started on my homework (there was no new glee, but there was a new HIMYM so I watched that and teared up a bit at Lily's speech, feeling all the feels of that wonderful show). I'm still a mess and I think brunch with people- any people from the building, god, anyone at all- will be just the thing to straighten me out and put me back in order. I'm so lonely, honest. Maybe I should have gone out last night, but I was too much of a mess to do that. I'm just a mess. God, I need to go back to class again. Class always gives me more practical things to focus on, like calc and plants and atoms and skepticism and books. Also I should probably go outside and walk around. There's that cute little suburb area by the rink, and really just everywhere around here is gorgeous with the trees and the air and the smell.

It's been a long weekend.

yer pal,
swegan :\

UPDATE: It was the same guy from before, and again (as I thought), nothing happened. She said I'd have to come out to a country bar sometime. I think it could be fun. That won't be for a couple of weeks, though (since I go home for thanksgiving).
I just really need to know what other people were doing last night. The curiosity is killing me.

UPDATE: Brunch was... interesting. Got down there early and ate with some other people in the building, though the nervous energy was driving me insane. Soon enough the people I went out with Friday and some of the other people they usually go out with came down, and I spent the rest of brunch eating my muffin slowly, bouncing my feet up and down like a crazy person, and finally I just decided I couldn't eat anything else and basically booked it up two flights of stairs until I got tired and walked the rest of the way and then I vacuumed and now I am much calmer. It's a relief. I feel like whatever was inside of me- that pent up nervous energy- is gone. Now, I can focus. I feel so zen.

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