Since my last post, things have improved. I downloaded a calorie tracking app for a while (which was more difficult to use than I thought, since finding items to add was often a game of "close enough"), which was interesting in that I could see where most of my calories were going. I've since stopped using it because I'm lazy and entering all the food I eat into my phone takes too long and I can't remember to do it. Also because I found that I now have a better understanding of the caloric content of things and how I typically eat, and when I do not buy junk food all the damn time, I actually eat really well.
Anyway, the only two "rules" I have applied are
1) Only buy junk food on the weekends
2) Don't take the bus to class unless you are running late or it is hella freezing outside
And they work for me. They are beyond easy to incorporate into my life, I have saved a lot of money, and I get quite a few steps in a day.
Also, on a note that seems tangential but isn't, I've recently become slightly obsessed with The Mindy Project (which is hilarious and awesome and adorable, by the way, and you should all watch it), and one of the lines from the show really stuck with me. I feel ridiculous thinking it, but I like the line "You're a woman, and that's good. Look like a woman." It's a good line (delivered in a very cute way, might I add), and it was kind of like a slap in the face for me, in the way where I was like "jesus what am I so worried about, I am fine."
On another note, I realized today how much I have learned in university. This came from two incidents:
1) My sister reading me the ingredients on a nail polish bottle and me realizing that my knowledge of organic (and okay, general) chemistry meant I could roughly picture a lot of the things in my head. Ethyl acetate? Hey, we use that in the lab! You can write EtoAc as an abbreviation! It was kind of nice to know that I have that knowledge. I can identify molecules. It's not super useful, but I can still do it. That is a thing I have learned.
2) My sister reading the last half of my psych chapter out to me (I even got an interesting idea for a paper during this, which I did not write down because I am an idiot). She said that it was mostly gibberish to her, but it all made perfect sense to me. Describing studies, results, and ethical implications of psychological treatments, and the biological methods of treating psychological disorders, and a bit about preventative stuff. I mean, I know it's first year psych, and that's not that big of a deal, but I still felt smart.
There was recently a confession posted on my university's confession page on fb about how science students often neglect getting a real education from someone who felt like they weren't learning anything in a science degree and so switched into a humanities one and felt much more educated. I find that bizarre, because in my 1.5 and a bit years of a science degree, I feel like I've learned a shitton of stuff and it is great. I know so much crap about a bunch of things, and I get to learn even more, and I get to study whatever I want. I really feel very lucky that I get to go to university, and a good one at that.
I think the best part is when my classes overlap. This has happened mostly between my science courses (ochem II, a basic genetics course, and intro to biochem) and then between my arts courses (psych II, which I hate because it is beyond boring to me, and my prof doesn't help, and women's and gender studies, which, though philosophy based, is finally being taught in a way that I can understand). I love it when that happens, because it means that I'm thinking about all the things I've learned and putting them together to learn even more. It's great when we learn about the repair of deaminated bases and T-T dimers in genetics, because I know what those things look like thanks to biochem. We can talk about the forces holding DNA and proteins together in biochemistry, and I understand how they work because I've taken and am taking organic chemistry. Everything builds on everything else and it is wonderful. I might just be learning the basics of science, but they're still very interesting.
So yeah, I've been feeling pretty smart and pretty lately. It's a nice trend, and one that I hope will continue. I'm also thankful that I've been put in an environment that encourages the development of both of those traits.
yer pal,
swegan
Showing posts with label little discoveries that make my day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label little discoveries that make my day. Show all posts
Friday, February 20, 2015
Wednesday, October 15, 2014
I know exactly what I want and it terrifies the shit out of me
This often happens in the fall and winter. I find myself pining for the mountains. But lately, I've found it happening so often that a scenario has started to take place in my mind. It's what I would like for my future life to be, ideally. I live in the mountains, or at least, my house is fucking surrounded by trees. Everywhere. And there's neigbours, but not too close, because of all the TREES.
I want to live in a small town, but in my reasonably-sized house with trees. I want there to be a university in this town, though, so it can't be too small. It should also be reasonably close to a larger city, for those nights when I want to go out on the town.
I work in the research department of that university. One way or another, I've obtained a "Dr." in front of my name, and I do research. Whether it's medical research or just biology research I don't know, but that's what I'm doing. And I run my own lab. I am in charge of it, I appoint the summer students, I do all the conferences, me. It's my lab. The lab of Dr. Swegan.
And I just like imagining coming home to my house in the trees and having it be warm and cozy, with lots of leather and varying shades of brown and lots of wood, wood furniture and flooring and ceilings. Like a cabin but not entirely like a cabin. It's cozy. I have a big bed covered in pillows and my room has a huge-ass window that is also a door that opens onto a balcony and so when I wake up and go to sleep, I see trees. Preferably with a sunrise over them in the morning.
And I have a little cozy spot in front of the fire, in a huge leather chair that's the kind of chair you sink into with a good book, and I sit there and stare out at the trees because that's right, the entire back of my house is also big-ass windows.
This same pining happened last year, only this year it feels worse. It's especially bad when I listen to a playlist of music I have that makes me feel safe, because this imaginary home and life is now my happy place.
The funny thing is, I don't ever see another person living with me. I'm always solitary, which is kind of unappealing. I think I'd want somebody around, even just a friend. Even just being at home by myself creeps me out- I'd need another person living in this house with me. But I think what's more significant is that there aren't any children. Obviously my mindset is that I'm still too young and I haven't lived much of a life yet, so I can't know if I want children or not. I don't know. I know I don't want them now, or any time in the next 10 years or so, that's for sure.
However, this is weirdly specific and very different from the idea I usually have, which is me living in a tiny, somewhat crappy, but cozy apartment in a small town. I don't know why I'm idealizing this small town in my head; I grew up in a small town and got to experience firsthand this summer how much it sucks living where there is almost nothing to do. But somehow, in this more young-adult version of the same town, I have things to do, and people I see, and I'm never bored or unhappy (well, I mean obviously I probably still am unhappy from time to time but never in a permanent way).
The problem with these fantasies is that I feel like they're so specific, they can never happen. Where in Canada am I going to find a place like that? BC somewhere? Vancouver Island? I don't know. And besides, I'm in my second year of an undergrad degree... getting either a Ph.D or an M.D. Ph.D is gonna be like a shitton of hard work that I am really not looking forward to, but I know that this is (at least for now) reasonably close to what I want to do with my life. I'm fairly confident that I could get into medical school somewhere if I started putting effort towards that, like I think I could pass the MCAT with enough studying and I'm finding things to do in this city now that help me feel... busier, I guess. Less like a homebody. Like I have a life, even if that life is just going to dance class once a week, having a regular date night, and sometimes hanging out with Carina to make food and watch netflix at her house. Carina and I keep trying to have wild adventures, but then I always chicken out. I'm shitty at trying new things that way.
In somewhat unrelated news, my roommate got me a birthday gift which was super sweet of her. It was a little sampler of tea from David's Tea, and the flavour was pumpkin chai, and HOLY FUCKING SHIT YOU GUYS, THIS TEA IS SO GOOD. It's got caramel in it which I think is the reason I like it so much, but it also just looks cute because the tea itself has little pumpkin candies in it and UGH you guys seriously, try it. It's cozy and perfect and delicious and UGH.
yer pal,
swegan :)
I want to live in a small town, but in my reasonably-sized house with trees. I want there to be a university in this town, though, so it can't be too small. It should also be reasonably close to a larger city, for those nights when I want to go out on the town.
I work in the research department of that university. One way or another, I've obtained a "Dr." in front of my name, and I do research. Whether it's medical research or just biology research I don't know, but that's what I'm doing. And I run my own lab. I am in charge of it, I appoint the summer students, I do all the conferences, me. It's my lab. The lab of Dr. Swegan.
And I just like imagining coming home to my house in the trees and having it be warm and cozy, with lots of leather and varying shades of brown and lots of wood, wood furniture and flooring and ceilings. Like a cabin but not entirely like a cabin. It's cozy. I have a big bed covered in pillows and my room has a huge-ass window that is also a door that opens onto a balcony and so when I wake up and go to sleep, I see trees. Preferably with a sunrise over them in the morning.
And I have a little cozy spot in front of the fire, in a huge leather chair that's the kind of chair you sink into with a good book, and I sit there and stare out at the trees because that's right, the entire back of my house is also big-ass windows.
This same pining happened last year, only this year it feels worse. It's especially bad when I listen to a playlist of music I have that makes me feel safe, because this imaginary home and life is now my happy place.
The funny thing is, I don't ever see another person living with me. I'm always solitary, which is kind of unappealing. I think I'd want somebody around, even just a friend. Even just being at home by myself creeps me out- I'd need another person living in this house with me. But I think what's more significant is that there aren't any children. Obviously my mindset is that I'm still too young and I haven't lived much of a life yet, so I can't know if I want children or not. I don't know. I know I don't want them now, or any time in the next 10 years or so, that's for sure.
However, this is weirdly specific and very different from the idea I usually have, which is me living in a tiny, somewhat crappy, but cozy apartment in a small town. I don't know why I'm idealizing this small town in my head; I grew up in a small town and got to experience firsthand this summer how much it sucks living where there is almost nothing to do. But somehow, in this more young-adult version of the same town, I have things to do, and people I see, and I'm never bored or unhappy (well, I mean obviously I probably still am unhappy from time to time but never in a permanent way).
The problem with these fantasies is that I feel like they're so specific, they can never happen. Where in Canada am I going to find a place like that? BC somewhere? Vancouver Island? I don't know. And besides, I'm in my second year of an undergrad degree... getting either a Ph.D or an M.D. Ph.D is gonna be like a shitton of hard work that I am really not looking forward to, but I know that this is (at least for now) reasonably close to what I want to do with my life. I'm fairly confident that I could get into medical school somewhere if I started putting effort towards that, like I think I could pass the MCAT with enough studying and I'm finding things to do in this city now that help me feel... busier, I guess. Less like a homebody. Like I have a life, even if that life is just going to dance class once a week, having a regular date night, and sometimes hanging out with Carina to make food and watch netflix at her house. Carina and I keep trying to have wild adventures, but then I always chicken out. I'm shitty at trying new things that way.
In somewhat unrelated news, my roommate got me a birthday gift which was super sweet of her. It was a little sampler of tea from David's Tea, and the flavour was pumpkin chai, and HOLY FUCKING SHIT YOU GUYS, THIS TEA IS SO GOOD. It's got caramel in it which I think is the reason I like it so much, but it also just looks cute because the tea itself has little pumpkin candies in it and UGH you guys seriously, try it. It's cozy and perfect and delicious and UGH.
yer pal,
swegan :)
Saturday, April 26, 2014
Letters (a fun 700th post!)
I saw this thing on tumblr. People are supposed to put one in the ask box and then you write a letter, but I thought hey, this would be an interesting blog post. Y'know, if people are interested in reading about my life. And then we reach this conundrum again, and I realize there is no obligation for me to blog about anything else. Besides, I'm between the ages of 15 and 25. These are the years when I'm supposed to be self centered, so why not run with it?
Dear Person I hate,
I hate you.
-Swegan
Dear Person I like,
I'm going to assume this is a person I admire as a person. And okay, so, I don't know how you're this great, I don't know how it's possible for someone to have a heart of gold. You have been there for me always, and I know I haven't fully returned the favour, and that weighs on my heart. You are one of those people I feel eternally lucky to know, and if I can, I'd like to hang on to you for as long as possible, because you are a constant source of light and goodness in my life.
-Swegan
Dear ex boyfriend,
Well, I think we're becoming friends, anyway. Or at least civil, or at least we can hang out and talk about stuff. You are still not the first person I go to when I am bored or sad or lonely and I doubt you ever will be again, but I sincerely hope we can get along and be some kind of friends again, because it seems like underneath you are a decent person, and it seems like you are deciding to bring that out. I wish you the best of luck with your future, and I hope that our friend group becomes stronger now that it's been two years.
-Swegan
Dear ex girlfriend,
Well, you don't actually exist, because I've never dated a girl. Maybe there'll be one of these in the future, I really can't say. But I hope we're at least civil.
-Swegan
Dear ex bestfriend,
I really don't know what motivated you to unfriend two of the people you were closest to on facebook. To me, that seems... rude, almost. I can't say I'm surprised, given how much you blew us off, and I can't say I'll miss your condescension towards me. Everyone treated me like an innocent lamb, but you were definitely one of the worst about it. Good luck with the career you've chosen, and I hope your new friends make you happy. I can't wish bad luck upon you, even though what you did still stings a little.
-Swegan
Dear Santa,
I'd really like to believe you exist because Christmas is one of those times of year that I feel like magic has to exist somewhere.
-Swegan
Dear mom,
I know we have our issues but I still trust you. I know you don't approve of my boyfriend, but I still value your opinion. Your help and advice and support to me all these years has been absolutely invaluable, and I would not be the person you say you are so proud of today if you had not been there to help me along. Here's to many more years and the joy of knowing that you'll probably be alive to meet any children I may have, and hoping that you will affect them as you did me. I love you.
However, I'd really like you to get off my case about my weight. I'm sick and tired of little comments slipped in when I'm eating "too much" or "badly" and how I am growing "out and not up" and how I need to "be careful." These comments are poison and it's really hard to ignore them. I know you think I'm pretty, but those comments make me feel like I am on the cusp of becoming unpretty, unwanted, someone to be ashamed of rather than proud of. Please, for the love of god, stop.
-Swegan
Dear dad,
If there's anything I hope to have inherited from you besides your intelligence, I hope it's your sense of humor. It's one of my favourite things about you. Like I did for mom, I thank you for all you did to help and support me throughout my life. It means a lot. I love you, too.
-Swegan
Dear future me,
I sincerely hope you are more well adjusted. And happy. I hope that you lived whatever life you wanted to, I hope that you loved passionately and never stopped being ridiculous and stayed friends with good people, that you were and are a good person who tries, even if you may not always succeed. I know you are still a feminist and I sincerely hope that the future you live in is better than this one for that reason.
-Swegan
Dear past me,
You made a lot of stupid decisions but you'll come out all right in the end.
-Swegan
Dear person I'm jealous of,
What, only one person? Ha. I have plenty of people to be jealous of. People who do better than me. People who get better grades, who have more natural talent, who float through life effortlessly, doing everything perfectly, having it all work out for you. Because I am competitive, I am jealous that I'm not the best at anything. I have a desperate need to be the best at something and it eats me up sometimes. But overall, I don't want to be any of you. I know that it's foolish to ask for your lives when mine is perfectly fine, even if I never come out at the front anymore.
-Swegan
Dear person I had a crush on,
Wow, you turned out to be kind of a dick. I mean, I still don't know you that well, and you have another girlfriend now, and I don't hate you. You seem to be just doing life. But your idea of life involves a lot of drinking and going out, and yet somehow also a lot of homework. I couldn't keep up with you, no matter how good looking you are. Thankfully, it is difficult to continue pining for you when a) you are an 8 hour drive away, b) you have a girlfriend now, and c) I now have a boyfriend of my own.
Dear significant other,
I know I say it all the time, but you're great. Really. You might bother me sometimes, with your bizarre factual knowledge of things no one cares about that you bring up in dinner conversations, or how you can correct me pretty much all the time, but I know you're not doing it out of malice. You are too kind of a person for that. I am beginning to think that you are another one of those bizarrely good people I meet and try to hang on to because those kind of people bring nothing but light into your life. I only know one other person like that, and the possibility of having found another is thrilling to me. I think people who read this blog know the kind of people I'm talking about. Not the ones who are so good it's impossible to hate them, but those people who seem to radiate goodness and light without trying, and you wonder why they're friends with you of all people.
Anyway... you've been a rock throughout my first year of university, and you're a good match for me. I know we've only been dating five months, but they've seriously been great. You've proven to be an excellent boyfriend and I am very much looking forward to a future with you in it.
I also miss you greatly. And I love you.
-Swegan
yer pal,
swegan :)
Dear Person I hate,
I hate you.
-Swegan
Dear Person I like,
I'm going to assume this is a person I admire as a person. And okay, so, I don't know how you're this great, I don't know how it's possible for someone to have a heart of gold. You have been there for me always, and I know I haven't fully returned the favour, and that weighs on my heart. You are one of those people I feel eternally lucky to know, and if I can, I'd like to hang on to you for as long as possible, because you are a constant source of light and goodness in my life.
-Swegan
Dear ex boyfriend,
Well, I think we're becoming friends, anyway. Or at least civil, or at least we can hang out and talk about stuff. You are still not the first person I go to when I am bored or sad or lonely and I doubt you ever will be again, but I sincerely hope we can get along and be some kind of friends again, because it seems like underneath you are a decent person, and it seems like you are deciding to bring that out. I wish you the best of luck with your future, and I hope that our friend group becomes stronger now that it's been two years.
-Swegan
Dear ex girlfriend,
Well, you don't actually exist, because I've never dated a girl. Maybe there'll be one of these in the future, I really can't say. But I hope we're at least civil.
-Swegan
Dear ex bestfriend,
I really don't know what motivated you to unfriend two of the people you were closest to on facebook. To me, that seems... rude, almost. I can't say I'm surprised, given how much you blew us off, and I can't say I'll miss your condescension towards me. Everyone treated me like an innocent lamb, but you were definitely one of the worst about it. Good luck with the career you've chosen, and I hope your new friends make you happy. I can't wish bad luck upon you, even though what you did still stings a little.
-Swegan
Dear Santa,
I'd really like to believe you exist because Christmas is one of those times of year that I feel like magic has to exist somewhere.
-Swegan
Dear mom,
I know we have our issues but I still trust you. I know you don't approve of my boyfriend, but I still value your opinion. Your help and advice and support to me all these years has been absolutely invaluable, and I would not be the person you say you are so proud of today if you had not been there to help me along. Here's to many more years and the joy of knowing that you'll probably be alive to meet any children I may have, and hoping that you will affect them as you did me. I love you.
However, I'd really like you to get off my case about my weight. I'm sick and tired of little comments slipped in when I'm eating "too much" or "badly" and how I am growing "out and not up" and how I need to "be careful." These comments are poison and it's really hard to ignore them. I know you think I'm pretty, but those comments make me feel like I am on the cusp of becoming unpretty, unwanted, someone to be ashamed of rather than proud of. Please, for the love of god, stop.
-Swegan
Dear dad,
If there's anything I hope to have inherited from you besides your intelligence, I hope it's your sense of humor. It's one of my favourite things about you. Like I did for mom, I thank you for all you did to help and support me throughout my life. It means a lot. I love you, too.
-Swegan
Dear future me,
I sincerely hope you are more well adjusted. And happy. I hope that you lived whatever life you wanted to, I hope that you loved passionately and never stopped being ridiculous and stayed friends with good people, that you were and are a good person who tries, even if you may not always succeed. I know you are still a feminist and I sincerely hope that the future you live in is better than this one for that reason.
-Swegan
Dear past me,
You made a lot of stupid decisions but you'll come out all right in the end.
-Swegan
Dear person I'm jealous of,
What, only one person? Ha. I have plenty of people to be jealous of. People who do better than me. People who get better grades, who have more natural talent, who float through life effortlessly, doing everything perfectly, having it all work out for you. Because I am competitive, I am jealous that I'm not the best at anything. I have a desperate need to be the best at something and it eats me up sometimes. But overall, I don't want to be any of you. I know that it's foolish to ask for your lives when mine is perfectly fine, even if I never come out at the front anymore.
-Swegan
Dear person I had a crush on,
Wow, you turned out to be kind of a dick. I mean, I still don't know you that well, and you have another girlfriend now, and I don't hate you. You seem to be just doing life. But your idea of life involves a lot of drinking and going out, and yet somehow also a lot of homework. I couldn't keep up with you, no matter how good looking you are. Thankfully, it is difficult to continue pining for you when a) you are an 8 hour drive away, b) you have a girlfriend now, and c) I now have a boyfriend of my own.
Dear significant other,
I know I say it all the time, but you're great. Really. You might bother me sometimes, with your bizarre factual knowledge of things no one cares about that you bring up in dinner conversations, or how you can correct me pretty much all the time, but I know you're not doing it out of malice. You are too kind of a person for that. I am beginning to think that you are another one of those bizarrely good people I meet and try to hang on to because those kind of people bring nothing but light into your life. I only know one other person like that, and the possibility of having found another is thrilling to me. I think people who read this blog know the kind of people I'm talking about. Not the ones who are so good it's impossible to hate them, but those people who seem to radiate goodness and light without trying, and you wonder why they're friends with you of all people.
Anyway... you've been a rock throughout my first year of university, and you're a good match for me. I know we've only been dating five months, but they've seriously been great. You've proven to be an excellent boyfriend and I am very much looking forward to a future with you in it.
I also miss you greatly. And I love you.
-Swegan
yer pal,
swegan :)
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Feminism on the internet
My Women's and Gender Studies (WGS) course is ridiculously easy. I find it bizarre that they're teaching us concepts like slut-shaming when I've known what that is since I first started looking for feminism online. As I put it to Ptarckas the other day: "It's like, 'what is slut shaming?' Gee, I don't know, why don't you ask tumblr?"
Taking this class also reminds me of a quote I saw (ironically, on tumblr) by someone who said she had gone to college and been absolutely floored by all this new information she'd learned in her first WGS class, and how amazed she was that so many people on tumblr considered those things to be so basic, things that are just required to be a base level decent human being. And I think that might actually be true.
The course I'm taking, while a second year course, is called "Introduction to Women's and Gender Studies." Some of the stuff we're learning is new to me, and it's absolutely fascinating, and I love knowing these things because they matter to me. I'm gaining a better understanding of intersectionality, too, which is good because that's something that so far the internet has not explained to me (on the pages I've found, I mean). But sometimes we discuss things like, well, slut-shaming, and they introduce it in this very basic way, and I'm sitting there like, yeah, I know.
It's nice because it means it's one course where I'm both really interested in learning more and kind of already know a lot. It's a GPA booster, but it's something I really care about. I guess that makes it more than a GPA booster, since I'm pretty dang sure I want to minor in this. I mean, what else was I going to minor in? Chemistry? Ugh, please. Business? Come on, mom, let's be realistic.
I'm not saying that I can totally predict my future and know how everything is going to turn out, but at this point, I've got a pretty good feeling about my choices. I love biology (and class is starting to be interesting now- we have our old prof back after a week of guest lectures from an excellent-but-less-excited prof, and wow did I miss my current one- she's just fantastic), and so majoring in it is a good choice. It's a lot of work, and I have to understand statistics and basic chemistry if I want to go further in it, but it's worth it. The sucky bits will end. The other thing I can't stand is designing labs- jesus christ, am I terrible at that. But I know that if I want to go on in biology, I have to work on that. And having a minor I really enjoy would definitely help.
Anyway, I just kind of thought that maybe just because I know this stuff, doesn't mean everyone does, even though I (and a shit-ton of other people, I'm willing to bet) do.
However, despite how great internet feminism can be (have you guys ever heard of Laci Green? She's fantastic. Seriously. Go and google her, or look up her videos on youtube. She will make your day. Why are you still reading this? It'll be here later. GO), it can also be really... intense and extreme. There's a lot of feminist bullying that goes on on the internet, and any deviation from this rigidly defined definition of "feminism" is just blown way out of proportion. While I agree that we should work to educate other people who perhaps don't realize that what they're saying is maybe hurtful, or sexist, or homophobic, or racist, etc, I don't think we should do so by calling them names, as tempting as it is. Fighting won't solve anything, and it definitely won't make feminism look good to everyone else. It's a cause, and causes need numbers, need members, need support. You can't get that if you make it look like being a feminist looks like being a religious fanatic. It's not going to work.
I always thought- and think- of feminism as something accepting and safe, a place where people can come and feel accepted and realize that they're not crazy for wanting to not be stereotyped and given different treatment because of their whatever that they can't control. It should not be a place of rigidly policed rules, and it definitely shouldn't be scary. My version of feminism definitely isn't scary (except when I come across articles about people who harrass patients outside of abortion clinics. Listen, I don't like violence, and I don't like confrontation, but nothing makes me angrier than people who harrass patients outside of abortion clinics. I could go on about them all day. Seriously, they are the worst kind of people), and I realize that my version isn't everyone's, and isn't perfect, but it works for me.
I mean, jesus christ, women have enough to conform to already. Why add feminism to that?
Annnnnyyyway, I do have a midterm in that class next week, soooo I should probably get back to studying. Just had to write this.
yer pal,
swegan :)
Taking this class also reminds me of a quote I saw (ironically, on tumblr) by someone who said she had gone to college and been absolutely floored by all this new information she'd learned in her first WGS class, and how amazed she was that so many people on tumblr considered those things to be so basic, things that are just required to be a base level decent human being. And I think that might actually be true.
The course I'm taking, while a second year course, is called "Introduction to Women's and Gender Studies." Some of the stuff we're learning is new to me, and it's absolutely fascinating, and I love knowing these things because they matter to me. I'm gaining a better understanding of intersectionality, too, which is good because that's something that so far the internet has not explained to me (on the pages I've found, I mean). But sometimes we discuss things like, well, slut-shaming, and they introduce it in this very basic way, and I'm sitting there like, yeah, I know.
It's nice because it means it's one course where I'm both really interested in learning more and kind of already know a lot. It's a GPA booster, but it's something I really care about. I guess that makes it more than a GPA booster, since I'm pretty dang sure I want to minor in this. I mean, what else was I going to minor in? Chemistry? Ugh, please. Business? Come on, mom, let's be realistic.
I'm not saying that I can totally predict my future and know how everything is going to turn out, but at this point, I've got a pretty good feeling about my choices. I love biology (and class is starting to be interesting now- we have our old prof back after a week of guest lectures from an excellent-but-less-excited prof, and wow did I miss my current one- she's just fantastic), and so majoring in it is a good choice. It's a lot of work, and I have to understand statistics and basic chemistry if I want to go further in it, but it's worth it. The sucky bits will end. The other thing I can't stand is designing labs- jesus christ, am I terrible at that. But I know that if I want to go on in biology, I have to work on that. And having a minor I really enjoy would definitely help.
Anyway, I just kind of thought that maybe just because I know this stuff, doesn't mean everyone does, even though I (and a shit-ton of other people, I'm willing to bet) do.
However, despite how great internet feminism can be (have you guys ever heard of Laci Green? She's fantastic. Seriously. Go and google her, or look up her videos on youtube. She will make your day. Why are you still reading this? It'll be here later. GO), it can also be really... intense and extreme. There's a lot of feminist bullying that goes on on the internet, and any deviation from this rigidly defined definition of "feminism" is just blown way out of proportion. While I agree that we should work to educate other people who perhaps don't realize that what they're saying is maybe hurtful, or sexist, or homophobic, or racist, etc, I don't think we should do so by calling them names, as tempting as it is. Fighting won't solve anything, and it definitely won't make feminism look good to everyone else. It's a cause, and causes need numbers, need members, need support. You can't get that if you make it look like being a feminist looks like being a religious fanatic. It's not going to work.
I always thought- and think- of feminism as something accepting and safe, a place where people can come and feel accepted and realize that they're not crazy for wanting to not be stereotyped and given different treatment because of their whatever that they can't control. It should not be a place of rigidly policed rules, and it definitely shouldn't be scary. My version of feminism definitely isn't scary (except when I come across articles about people who harrass patients outside of abortion clinics. Listen, I don't like violence, and I don't like confrontation, but nothing makes me angrier than people who harrass patients outside of abortion clinics. I could go on about them all day. Seriously, they are the worst kind of people), and I realize that my version isn't everyone's, and isn't perfect, but it works for me.
I mean, jesus christ, women have enough to conform to already. Why add feminism to that?
Annnnnyyyway, I do have a midterm in that class next week, soooo I should probably get back to studying. Just had to write this.
yer pal,
swegan :)
Monday, January 20, 2014
My big scary park adventure
I got on the bus at a weird bus stop halfway down the street between my street and uni, and I waited there for 15 minutes before the bus I wanted showed up. I rode that bus for seven minutes, got off, and panicked when I didn't know where I was. But then I saw the park behind me, remembered the direction in which we walked at orientation, and headed that way.
I realized it was a bad idea pretty quickly. There was no one out there but me- it's right by a major road in the city, one of those ones that goes fast but usually there aren't a ton of cars. I knew I had about 50 minutes until the sun completely set, and so I finally found the entrance to the park and started walking along a path cleared in the show. When I tried to deviate from this path, the snow went up to my knees, so I had to follow it.
I found a picnic shelter by a playground, thinking that was the place, and then got frustrated and pulled out google maps on my phone when it wasn't. Following google maps, I managed to find the rink after a lot of walking. The only other people I saw were people jogging.
When I finally found the rink, there was a fence all around it and it didn't look like anyone was in the booth of the building where they did skate sharpening and rentals, so I turned around. It was pretty warm last week, pretty much above zero the whole time. I guess the ice was too thin to skate on... I'll have to wait until it gets chilly again and then try. Perhaps this Friday I'll go again. Now that I know the way, I can just leave after school or something.
Anyway, on my way out, I took some pictures, and realized how big the park actually was. Even at home, we have a few parks that are pretty large, but that park just felt... vast. Empty. Sort of like a National Park, and I felt like I was in it all alone as night was dawning. The trees were really big, too, and the park itself IS actually very large. It was kind of nice, though, to feel small, and to realize I'd trekked through that park all on my own.
I'd very much like to go again. But I'd like to actually skate this time. The rink was beautiful, nestled in all that nature. Come on, slightly colder temperatures!
Oh, and a few pictures of the sunset.
yer pal,
swegan :)
I realized it was a bad idea pretty quickly. There was no one out there but me- it's right by a major road in the city, one of those ones that goes fast but usually there aren't a ton of cars. I knew I had about 50 minutes until the sun completely set, and so I finally found the entrance to the park and started walking along a path cleared in the show. When I tried to deviate from this path, the snow went up to my knees, so I had to follow it.
I found a picnic shelter by a playground, thinking that was the place, and then got frustrated and pulled out google maps on my phone when it wasn't. Following google maps, I managed to find the rink after a lot of walking. The only other people I saw were people jogging.
When I finally found the rink, there was a fence all around it and it didn't look like anyone was in the booth of the building where they did skate sharpening and rentals, so I turned around. It was pretty warm last week, pretty much above zero the whole time. I guess the ice was too thin to skate on... I'll have to wait until it gets chilly again and then try. Perhaps this Friday I'll go again. Now that I know the way, I can just leave after school or something.
Anyway, on my way out, I took some pictures, and realized how big the park actually was. Even at home, we have a few parks that are pretty large, but that park just felt... vast. Empty. Sort of like a National Park, and I felt like I was in it all alone as night was dawning. The trees were really big, too, and the park itself IS actually very large. It was kind of nice, though, to feel small, and to realize I'd trekked through that park all on my own.
I'd very much like to go again. But I'd like to actually skate this time. The rink was beautiful, nestled in all that nature. Come on, slightly colder temperatures!
Oh, and a few pictures of the sunset.
yer pal,
swegan :)
Sunday, December 1, 2013
"You are not owed a world in which only beautiful people enter your view"
I got a little distracted on Sparknotes trying to review for English, and stumbled across this article: http://community.sparknotes.com/2013/10/14/auntie-sparknotes-is-it-common-courtesy-to-cover-my-eczema. It's very, very true, and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is silly and conceited. People don't always look perfect and they certainly don't owe it to anyone to cover up their imperfections. People have acne and rashes and scars, and that's that. I know I've been guilty of thinking things like this, too, and it is truly not a good thing to do (and I have been trying to replace it by thinking three nice things about that person every time I think something bad about them (re: appearances), which really helps because it forces me to see the beauty in other people, rather than what's not perfect about them) (and to recognize that they are people too).
It resonated with me because of a conversation I had last year with a couple of friends in the cafeteria. They told me this little story of how "some fat girl was just in here wearing this tank top that was way too tight, and it just didn't look good on her, y'know, like you have to dress for your body", etc etc. At the time I think I agreed with them, which was heinous and wrong and don't agree with people when they say that, please. Because I went home and realized that, wait a minute, there's something wrong here.
When people say "Dress for your body shape" usually it means "dress in the most flattering way" which I'm guessing roughly translates to "dress in the way that makes you look skinniest" and there is just something so fucked up about that I can't even.
This little incident, I thought, related to this article/advice thing/whatever as well. You don't have to dress a certain way to please people that think that if you're not dressing to look your skinniest you're doing it wrong. There's nothing wrong with dressing that way, but there's nothing wrong with not dressing that way, either. You don't owe it to anyone to dress a certain way. And if anyone tries to tell you that someone else looks "disgusting" squeezing out of their tank top, you can tell them that actually it's none of their fucking business and that you hope they have a nice day.
Dress is complicated because there's still some occasions where that's not okay, i.e., business things, formal functions, etc. But in everyday life, who cares? I just hope that everyone dresses warmly enough for the weather, because that is a matter of health and wellness and not just appearance and so I am a stickler for it. I mean if you think you can handle wearing a miniskirt at this time of year this far North, I applaud you, but I am still going to question your judgement.
This isn't to say that you have to like how people dress, either. You're not obligated to do that. But don't judge them based on their appearance- hell, if I had just said "no" to Grag when he asked me out because he wears sweatpants LITERALLY ALL THE TIME, where would I be now? The important thing to remember is that there are people in those clothes who might actually become really good friends, or even more than good friends (IF YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN') if you just ignore the fact that you think their wardrobe is horrible and get to know them. (On the other hand, they might also be people you will not get along with. Dress is not an indicator of compatibility). I am a firm believer in the idea that personality is what counts, and if things do work out, then you won't really care about what they look like because you'll know that within is this awesome person that you get to know and hang out with. It's fantastic.
yer pal,
swegan :)
It resonated with me because of a conversation I had last year with a couple of friends in the cafeteria. They told me this little story of how "some fat girl was just in here wearing this tank top that was way too tight, and it just didn't look good on her, y'know, like you have to dress for your body", etc etc. At the time I think I agreed with them, which was heinous and wrong and don't agree with people when they say that, please. Because I went home and realized that, wait a minute, there's something wrong here.
When people say "Dress for your body shape" usually it means "dress in the most flattering way" which I'm guessing roughly translates to "dress in the way that makes you look skinniest" and there is just something so fucked up about that I can't even.
This little incident, I thought, related to this article/advice thing/whatever as well. You don't have to dress a certain way to please people that think that if you're not dressing to look your skinniest you're doing it wrong. There's nothing wrong with dressing that way, but there's nothing wrong with not dressing that way, either. You don't owe it to anyone to dress a certain way. And if anyone tries to tell you that someone else looks "disgusting" squeezing out of their tank top, you can tell them that actually it's none of their fucking business and that you hope they have a nice day.
Dress is complicated because there's still some occasions where that's not okay, i.e., business things, formal functions, etc. But in everyday life, who cares? I just hope that everyone dresses warmly enough for the weather, because that is a matter of health and wellness and not just appearance and so I am a stickler for it. I mean if you think you can handle wearing a miniskirt at this time of year this far North, I applaud you, but I am still going to question your judgement.
This isn't to say that you have to like how people dress, either. You're not obligated to do that. But don't judge them based on their appearance- hell, if I had just said "no" to Grag when he asked me out because he wears sweatpants LITERALLY ALL THE TIME, where would I be now? The important thing to remember is that there are people in those clothes who might actually become really good friends, or even more than good friends (IF YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN') if you just ignore the fact that you think their wardrobe is horrible and get to know them. (On the other hand, they might also be people you will not get along with. Dress is not an indicator of compatibility). I am a firm believer in the idea that personality is what counts, and if things do work out, then you won't really care about what they look like because you'll know that within is this awesome person that you get to know and hang out with. It's fantastic.
yer pal,
swegan :)
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Okay but just
what is even happening
YES I AM STILL SUPER STRESSED OUT ABOUT MY PAPERS AND MY BIO LAB AND MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE BUT I JUST WENT ON A 1.5 HOUR WALK WITH A GUY WHO SAID, AND I QUOTE: "I hate it when reasonable ideologies like feminism get taken to extremes" AND I WAS JUST LIKE YES YOU THIS IS GOING TO BE A THING YOU RESPECT MY INTEREST IN FEMINISM YOU JUST EARNED 100000 POINTS IN YOUR FAVOUR also it is really shitty outside, like gray and depressing and cold and windy and the rain is blowing at an angle, and he still walked around with me. For an hour and a half. We walked down the same streets twice sometimes. At one point we sang a bit of "singin' in the rain" together. And just. We have the best conversations, I swear. We talk about everything and anything at all and he lets me blabber on for ages about stupid stuff and doesn't mind when I interrupt him at the end of a block to ask which way we should go next. I just like hanging out with him. A lot. And given the state of the weather today SHIT I STILL HAVE TO PAY FOR PARKING OOPS I SHOULD PROBABLY CALL and then I guess... then she'll know I tried to stop by a couple times. Anyway, as I was saying- given the state of the weather today, it's very clear that he really likes me if he was out with me in that weather for no reason at all. He also said he wanted to try and make my day less sucky (and I was pretty depressed earlier, so he succeeded) which was actually really sweet and just...
Earlier today I was mulling over the fact that the three guys who have liked me in my entire life have basically been the same: sweet boys who are really nerdy and have bad fashion sense. But I guess... it's the sweet part. It's the part where they can actually be really genuine people. Nerd was a really great person when I first met him, and he's still a pretty nice guy (albeit he can be a little condescending and kind of sexist... but he's still a nice person). It's the niceness that draws me in, the way I can have good conversations with people, the ways I can clearly tell that they like me. Suddenly his apparent lack of real pants and the fact that he's taking two classes (as if that's any way to figure out what you want to do (imo) (end sarcasm)) don't seem to matter as much. Plus he gave me a hug which I decided was a little bit awkwardly long but then decided was nice because I really needed a hug and also I think I actually like this guy, so..... not all bad, I suppose.
Funny because I was so blatantly against this a few weeks ago. WHY DOES MY MIND CHANGE SO QUICKLY? Ugh. Whatever. He's nice to me, we have great conversations, and he genuinely likes me. Like a lot. Like, it's actually pretty adorable and endearing. Like this might actually be a thing AND HE MIGHT ACTUALLY SING "Baby it's cold outside" WITH ME BECAUSE OF THE SINGING IN THE RAIN THING OMFG I WANT THAT TO HAPPEN SO MUCH THAT WOULD BE SO EPIC.
All I can think of now- with a smug little smirk on my face- is how much my parents would disapprove of all of this. But fuck that, it's my life, and if I want to let this become a thing, then I am allowed to let it become a thing. I'm a reasonable person, he's a reasonable person. The whole thing should be pretty darn reasonable. Plus at this point we're still at that stage where nothing is bad, and that's the best stage ever. PLUS HE IS UNDERSTANDING OF THE FACT THAT I HAVE A LOT TO DO and we end up seeing each other twice a week anyways.
ANYway I do have an essay to write. Actually, two. I think I should get some ideas going for my English essay, given that it's worth 50% of my grade...
yer pal,
swegan :)
YES I AM STILL SUPER STRESSED OUT ABOUT MY PAPERS AND MY BIO LAB AND MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE BUT I JUST WENT ON A 1.5 HOUR WALK WITH A GUY WHO SAID, AND I QUOTE: "I hate it when reasonable ideologies like feminism get taken to extremes" AND I WAS JUST LIKE YES YOU THIS IS GOING TO BE A THING YOU RESPECT MY INTEREST IN FEMINISM YOU JUST EARNED 100000 POINTS IN YOUR FAVOUR also it is really shitty outside, like gray and depressing and cold and windy and the rain is blowing at an angle, and he still walked around with me. For an hour and a half. We walked down the same streets twice sometimes. At one point we sang a bit of "singin' in the rain" together. And just. We have the best conversations, I swear. We talk about everything and anything at all and he lets me blabber on for ages about stupid stuff and doesn't mind when I interrupt him at the end of a block to ask which way we should go next. I just like hanging out with him. A lot. And given the state of the weather today SHIT I STILL HAVE TO PAY FOR PARKING OOPS I SHOULD PROBABLY CALL and then I guess... then she'll know I tried to stop by a couple times. Anyway, as I was saying- given the state of the weather today, it's very clear that he really likes me if he was out with me in that weather for no reason at all. He also said he wanted to try and make my day less sucky (and I was pretty depressed earlier, so he succeeded) which was actually really sweet and just...
Earlier today I was mulling over the fact that the three guys who have liked me in my entire life have basically been the same: sweet boys who are really nerdy and have bad fashion sense. But I guess... it's the sweet part. It's the part where they can actually be really genuine people. Nerd was a really great person when I first met him, and he's still a pretty nice guy (albeit he can be a little condescending and kind of sexist... but he's still a nice person). It's the niceness that draws me in, the way I can have good conversations with people, the ways I can clearly tell that they like me. Suddenly his apparent lack of real pants and the fact that he's taking two classes (as if that's any way to figure out what you want to do (imo) (end sarcasm)) don't seem to matter as much. Plus he gave me a hug which I decided was a little bit awkwardly long but then decided was nice because I really needed a hug and also I think I actually like this guy, so..... not all bad, I suppose.
Funny because I was so blatantly against this a few weeks ago. WHY DOES MY MIND CHANGE SO QUICKLY? Ugh. Whatever. He's nice to me, we have great conversations, and he genuinely likes me. Like a lot. Like, it's actually pretty adorable and endearing. Like this might actually be a thing AND HE MIGHT ACTUALLY SING "Baby it's cold outside" WITH ME BECAUSE OF THE SINGING IN THE RAIN THING OMFG I WANT THAT TO HAPPEN SO MUCH THAT WOULD BE SO EPIC.
All I can think of now- with a smug little smirk on my face- is how much my parents would disapprove of all of this. But fuck that, it's my life, and if I want to let this become a thing, then I am allowed to let it become a thing. I'm a reasonable person, he's a reasonable person. The whole thing should be pretty darn reasonable. Plus at this point we're still at that stage where nothing is bad, and that's the best stage ever. PLUS HE IS UNDERSTANDING OF THE FACT THAT I HAVE A LOT TO DO and we end up seeing each other twice a week anyways.
ANYway I do have an essay to write. Actually, two. I think I should get some ideas going for my English essay, given that it's worth 50% of my grade...
yer pal,
swegan :)
Saturday, September 21, 2013
MY CHILDHOOD
I watched a lot of quality shows, yo. And quite a few were Canadian. I later learned that apparently Canada actually has a reputation for making kids' shows.
Actually wow, I ended up watching a lot of Canadian kids' TV shows:
-Big Comfy Couch
-Little Bear
-Berenstein Bears
-George Shrinks (okay this wasn't entirely Canadian but still)
-Franklin
-Babar
-Bear in the Big Blue House
-Zoboomafoo (don't quote me on that)
-Max and Ruby
-Crazy Quilt
-Tansy and Roseabelle
-Jacob Two-two
And then the non-Canadian ones:
-Blues Clues (this one still holds a special spot in my heart. I loved this show)
-Spongebob Squarepants (THIS SHOW WAS GREAT for like four seasons)
-Barney
-Timothy goes to school
-Teletubbies
-Lamp Chop's Play Along
-Seven Little Monsters (is this one Canadian? I can't tell)
-Rolie Polie Olie
And then I got a little older and I remember watching others.
-Martin Mystery (FUN FACT: The girl who voices Diana also voices Barbie in most of the Barbie movies).
-Mystery Hunters (I got so scared of this so often that mom actually forbade me to watch it until I was 10)
-Totally Spies (this show was THE SHIT)
-6teen (I think I just watched it b/c one of my friends did)
-Life with Derek (this was Canadian, too!)
-The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
-Hannah Montana (Freckles made me watch it)
-Zoey 101
-Atomic Betty (not very often, though, I barely remember this one)
-I was a teenage robot (not often either)
Okay holy shit, I just had a thought. When mom forbade me to watch Mystery Hunters (THE EPISODE ABOUT THE GIANT BIRD MAN STILL HAUNTS ME TO THIS DAY) until I was 10... well, when I was 10, how i met your mother was just starting its first season, which confuses me. how i met your mother is a show I associate with being a teenager. Mystery Hunters is a show I associate very much with being a child.
Also can I say something about the theme songs? Because some of those kids shows had great theme songs. Franklin, Bear in the Big Blue House, Blues Clues, Berenstein Bears, Babar... there's lots of not-popular-music-music in there. Like actually all the music for Blues Clues is pretty much my favourite soundtrack for any TV show ever.
I think I need to watch some more of that show to put me to sleep. I'm all nostalgic now. And confused about Little Bear, because all I remember of that show is the one movie they made where they found another bear and had to help him get home?
And now I'm remembering books. I remember that one about the farmyard animal friends who went on a bike ride, and Click, Clack, Moo: Cows that Type and The Kissing Hand and all those Franklin/Berenstein bear books Freckles and I used to have read to us each night. We had a huge box of Franklin books and Berenstein Bear books all over the place. I remember going to chapters once when I was 13, and seeing "The Berenstein Bears go to Church" and feeling extremely disappointed. The Berenstein Bears always had adventures, but religion was never part of it. They were just living. Seeing that kind of made me feel like my childhood had ended.
SPEAKING OF BOOKS THE MAGIC TREE HOUSE SERIES WAS THE SHIT AND DON'T LET NOBODY TELL YOU DIFFERENT.
And Junie B. Jones. JUNIE B. JONES. I am not kidding when I say those books probably influenced my writing more than you'd think. I still remember the first one I read. It was "Junie B. Jones is a Party Animal" and it was like my favourite book of all time. I think I ended up reading every single book in the series. So while everyone else was reading Harry Potter, that's what I was doing. Reading Junie B. Jones. So I guess that makes Barbara Park the author of my childhood. Actually I think those books probably influenced me as a person. I related to those books. I loved them. I gobbled them up. I read them all. I related immensely to Junie B. Jones. Shit, man. Those books mean something to me.
Okay. I seriously need to go to bed. Like, now. I feel all nostalgic and looking up at my calendar just reminds me I'm not a kid anymore and I'm supposed to like all these grown up shows and do grown up things like university and just UGH NOPE I WANT TO BE 7 AGAIN PLS. Although that means I'd have to go through middle school again. Let's just say I would rather never repeat middle school again. For anything. I am being perfectly serious when I say there is no amount of money you could pay me to go through middle school again.
GOODNIGHT
yer pal,
swegan :)
Actually wow, I ended up watching a lot of Canadian kids' TV shows:
-Big Comfy Couch
-Little Bear
-Berenstein Bears
-George Shrinks (okay this wasn't entirely Canadian but still)
-Franklin
-Babar
-Bear in the Big Blue House
-Zoboomafoo (don't quote me on that)
-Max and Ruby
-Crazy Quilt
-Tansy and Roseabelle
-Jacob Two-two
And then the non-Canadian ones:
-Blues Clues (this one still holds a special spot in my heart. I loved this show)
-Spongebob Squarepants (THIS SHOW WAS GREAT for like four seasons)
-Barney
-Timothy goes to school
-Teletubbies
-Lamp Chop's Play Along
-Seven Little Monsters (is this one Canadian? I can't tell)
-Rolie Polie Olie
And then I got a little older and I remember watching others.
-Martin Mystery (FUN FACT: The girl who voices Diana also voices Barbie in most of the Barbie movies).
-Mystery Hunters (I got so scared of this so often that mom actually forbade me to watch it until I was 10)
-Totally Spies (this show was THE SHIT)
-6teen (I think I just watched it b/c one of my friends did)
-Life with Derek (this was Canadian, too!)
-The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
-Hannah Montana (Freckles made me watch it)
-Zoey 101
-Atomic Betty (not very often, though, I barely remember this one)
-I was a teenage robot (not often either)
Okay holy shit, I just had a thought. When mom forbade me to watch Mystery Hunters (THE EPISODE ABOUT THE GIANT BIRD MAN STILL HAUNTS ME TO THIS DAY) until I was 10... well, when I was 10, how i met your mother was just starting its first season, which confuses me. how i met your mother is a show I associate with being a teenager. Mystery Hunters is a show I associate very much with being a child.
Also can I say something about the theme songs? Because some of those kids shows had great theme songs. Franklin, Bear in the Big Blue House, Blues Clues, Berenstein Bears, Babar... there's lots of not-popular-music-music in there. Like actually all the music for Blues Clues is pretty much my favourite soundtrack for any TV show ever.
I think I need to watch some more of that show to put me to sleep. I'm all nostalgic now. And confused about Little Bear, because all I remember of that show is the one movie they made where they found another bear and had to help him get home?
And now I'm remembering books. I remember that one about the farmyard animal friends who went on a bike ride, and Click, Clack, Moo: Cows that Type and The Kissing Hand and all those Franklin/Berenstein bear books Freckles and I used to have read to us each night. We had a huge box of Franklin books and Berenstein Bear books all over the place. I remember going to chapters once when I was 13, and seeing "The Berenstein Bears go to Church" and feeling extremely disappointed. The Berenstein Bears always had adventures, but religion was never part of it. They were just living. Seeing that kind of made me feel like my childhood had ended.
SPEAKING OF BOOKS THE MAGIC TREE HOUSE SERIES WAS THE SHIT AND DON'T LET NOBODY TELL YOU DIFFERENT.
And Junie B. Jones. JUNIE B. JONES. I am not kidding when I say those books probably influenced my writing more than you'd think. I still remember the first one I read. It was "Junie B. Jones is a Party Animal" and it was like my favourite book of all time. I think I ended up reading every single book in the series. So while everyone else was reading Harry Potter, that's what I was doing. Reading Junie B. Jones. So I guess that makes Barbara Park the author of my childhood. Actually I think those books probably influenced me as a person. I related to those books. I loved them. I gobbled them up. I read them all. I related immensely to Junie B. Jones. Shit, man. Those books mean something to me.
Okay. I seriously need to go to bed. Like, now. I feel all nostalgic and looking up at my calendar just reminds me I'm not a kid anymore and I'm supposed to like all these grown up shows and do grown up things like university and just UGH NOPE I WANT TO BE 7 AGAIN PLS. Although that means I'd have to go through middle school again. Let's just say I would rather never repeat middle school again. For anything. I am being perfectly serious when I say there is no amount of money you could pay me to go through middle school again.
GOODNIGHT
yer pal,
swegan :)
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Holy feminsm
So today was bascially just more orientation finished off with the president's address (which was amazing and super fun, btw). We also went to clubs fair- I think I'll join the dance team, but outside of that I'm not sure. Maybe Amnesty international, although I tried that before and I wasn't very good at it. There's also this space exploration technology or something club (it had a specific name but I can't remember what it was) that I put my email down for. It looked so cool, I couldn't help it. So I think that's at least two clubs- probably plenty for me. The outdoors club looks too expensive and time consuming (although it does look pretty fun), and I didn't really see anything else. I was extremely disappointed not to see any writing clubs or feminist clubs of any sort (although the sexual assault center had a table with some posters, zines, and brochures on it although there was no one behind it- I mean it was still something I guess).
I went to the computers and libraries seminar- very helpful- and then I went to the one called "Party smart and sexy" AND IT WAS SO FUCKING FANTASTIC OMG. I thought they were just going to be like "this is how you drink safely and don't rape" but it went so much further than that- they talked about slut shaming, sexual harrassment, victim blaming, date/acquaintance rape, STIs, communication in relationships... it was so fabulous it made the feminist inside me cry tears of joy. FINALLY OTHER PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT THIS! Plus the whole thing- all the seminars were skits- was based on how i met your mother, which made it better. They even changed Marshall to Marsha, so that they could touch on gay relationships briefly. It was so fantastic and I swear I almost cried from being so happy that this was happening and other people were in the room hearing it and hopefully taking it seriously and just GAH SO MUCH YAY.
They also gave out little swag-bag featuring pieces of paper with information about consent, campus resources, a little zine about online resources and books to check out, and info about which birth control types were covered by the university health insurance. Oh, and a condom. And a dental dam. So... yay? I'm assuming these things will not be used by me probably until next year at the earliest, but I guess it's always good to be prepared...?
We got to learn cheers today, too- I loved the ones for the faculty of science (my faculty). A particular favourite line of mine was "Don't you get on our bad side/ Or we'll slip you cyanide" and I was also a fan of the one where awesome was spelled "S!CI!EN!CE!" and just everything about it was fabulous. The nurses and the engineers also had a rivalry going on... it was fun to watch because the engineering cheers were all deep voiced since mostly guys go into engineering, and then the nurses would answer with their much higher pitched cheers, since nursing was mostly female.
Ooh, and they had a free barbecue for the Science faculty today, so haha to those other faculties, we got free food AND free swag. So much free swag, oh my god. Not to mention we all got t-shirts before the president's address, but the science faculty got there last when they were all out of smalls AND mediums and I think the larges were dwindling so ALL THEY HAD WAS EXTRA LARGE T-SHIRTS AND IT FIT ME LIKE A DRESS. I suppose if I wash it enough it'll shrink, but I was still disappointed that I couldn't even get a medium.
It was a good time, but now I'm tired, and I do have a class at 9 AM so I should probably head to bed. Just wanted to share some more university adventures and my feminist joy.
JESUS MY ROOMMATE SHUTS HER DOORS LOUDLY WHAT THE HELL. It keeps startling me. She's super nice and talkative and even invited me to come hang out with her friends, though, and I really like her. We get along pretty well. I feel lucky that I got such a great roommate. Things could be a lot worse.
Speaking of which... I really need to go to bed. Breakfast starts at 7 and it's so so so good here.
yer pal,
swegan :)
I went to the computers and libraries seminar- very helpful- and then I went to the one called "Party smart and sexy" AND IT WAS SO FUCKING FANTASTIC OMG. I thought they were just going to be like "this is how you drink safely and don't rape" but it went so much further than that- they talked about slut shaming, sexual harrassment, victim blaming, date/acquaintance rape, STIs, communication in relationships... it was so fabulous it made the feminist inside me cry tears of joy. FINALLY OTHER PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT THIS! Plus the whole thing- all the seminars were skits- was based on how i met your mother, which made it better. They even changed Marshall to Marsha, so that they could touch on gay relationships briefly. It was so fantastic and I swear I almost cried from being so happy that this was happening and other people were in the room hearing it and hopefully taking it seriously and just GAH SO MUCH YAY.
They also gave out little swag-bag featuring pieces of paper with information about consent, campus resources, a little zine about online resources and books to check out, and info about which birth control types were covered by the university health insurance. Oh, and a condom. And a dental dam. So... yay? I'm assuming these things will not be used by me probably until next year at the earliest, but I guess it's always good to be prepared...?
We got to learn cheers today, too- I loved the ones for the faculty of science (my faculty). A particular favourite line of mine was "Don't you get on our bad side/ Or we'll slip you cyanide" and I was also a fan of the one where awesome was spelled "S!CI!EN!CE!" and just everything about it was fabulous. The nurses and the engineers also had a rivalry going on... it was fun to watch because the engineering cheers were all deep voiced since mostly guys go into engineering, and then the nurses would answer with their much higher pitched cheers, since nursing was mostly female.
Ooh, and they had a free barbecue for the Science faculty today, so haha to those other faculties, we got free food AND free swag. So much free swag, oh my god. Not to mention we all got t-shirts before the president's address, but the science faculty got there last when they were all out of smalls AND mediums and I think the larges were dwindling so ALL THEY HAD WAS EXTRA LARGE T-SHIRTS AND IT FIT ME LIKE A DRESS. I suppose if I wash it enough it'll shrink, but I was still disappointed that I couldn't even get a medium.
It was a good time, but now I'm tired, and I do have a class at 9 AM so I should probably head to bed. Just wanted to share some more university adventures and my feminist joy.
JESUS MY ROOMMATE SHUTS HER DOORS LOUDLY WHAT THE HELL. It keeps startling me. She's super nice and talkative and even invited me to come hang out with her friends, though, and I really like her. We get along pretty well. I feel lucky that I got such a great roommate. Things could be a lot worse.
Speaking of which... I really need to go to bed. Breakfast starts at 7 and it's so so so good here.
yer pal,
swegan :)
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