Saturday, November 16, 2013

Oh so that's what winter is

I woke up this morning and it looked like a blizzard outside. I rolled over, checked the weather forecast on my phone, and it was like 'Snowfall warning' and 'it's only -10 outside but it feels like -20" and just ALL THOSE COMMENTS DESCRIBING WINTER THAT WERE JUST "Welcome to hell" MAKE SENSE NOW LIKE OH.

Seriously, though, it's really coming down out there. I had thought yesterday that I'd go to the library and study, but I don't want to go out in this unless I absolutely have to. I guess it's safe to pull out my parka and heated mittens now, also... which means the end of hand-holding outside, which is kinda disappointing, but hey you can still hold someone's mitten-hand, y/y? Although probably no more walks will happen if it keeps snowing and blowing like this. This is very disappointing. All those walks we took were so much fun and I was like "wow if we keep doing this this relationship is gonna be so good for my health" but nooo, now it has to be winter. UGH CANADA PLS.

Of course the benefit of winter is that it's all cozy and so that's romantic. But it sounds weird saying that. NOOO SWEGAN, YOU ARE AN ADULT, YOU ARE ALLOWED TO SAY ROMANTIC. But it still feels weird saying that. Fuck, it still feels weird saying I have a boyfriend. Yep. Yeah that's weird. That's super weird.

In other news, I should be writing, because I have two characters who are adults who CAN be romantic without it being weird, if they would just realize they're meant to be already, augh.

Do you ever feel like you have friends but you don't? Like I know there's people I could talk to and Lucy and I live in the same city, for crying out loud, but we never see each other. I see Carina in bio and we're going out to a festival-thing next friday (her and I and someone else I don't know). I talk to Vince on skype a lot, and also her friend that she introduced me to who does not have a nickname as of yet. I talk to people in my building quite a bit, and I think some of us might be going out to a movie tonight, but I'm not sure. I talk to my roommate. I talk to the guy who sits next to me in math (we may or may not have math together again next semester, so I guess that's nice). I talk to the people around me in English a little bit. I interact with people on facebook... does that count? I don't really know. I feel like last year I had all these friends I spent all this time with and we had all our classes together and we were really close,and this year it's different, and I feel weird about the fact that I don't really mind. I spend a lot of time just by myself, talking to friends via the internet... is that so bad?

Also, whenever I list friends, I never include people I am in a relationship with, because of course everyone just wants to see the people they're in a relationship with all the f*cking time and it is seriously annoying b/c I am like "no, no I need to have balance in my life" but that's really hard to do when literally all you want to do is not that. UGH WORDS PLS.

It isn't UNreasonable to see people you're in a relationship with more than twice a week, though, is it? How do I do this without turning into one of those people who have no life outside of their boy/girlfriend? Ugh. UGH. UGH THIS IS STUPID UGH UGH UGH. UGH I HAVE ALL THIS HOMEWORK TO DO THIS WEEKEND. Like editing my english essay that's worth half my grade! And studying for the chem lab final which apparently is a real kick in the ass and some girl last year thought she did well and got 2/20 on it! And doing math, because that's always so much fun! And typing up info for my bio presentation! Actually that's it. Jesus, and I'm stressed out over this? I had more homework than this last year in IB. Perhaps it's because the stakes are higher? That's gotta be it, because that chem lab final is super terrifying. BUT AS AN ASAPSCIENCE VIDEO JUST INFORMED ME, oxytocin, which apparently is "the cuddle hormone" and not the "uterine cramps hormone", helps to relieve stress. And how is it released? Through positive social interaction. AND GUESS WHO'S GETTING A LOT OF POSITIVE SOCIAL INTERACTION NOW, HAHAHAHA oh wait but I don't get to see Grag again until Tuesday hahahahaha.

Well I guess I should write my novel now.

yer pal,
swegan :)

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