For fucking REAL tho being the teacher is worse than being the student

I had this epiphany while marking 61 thoroughly mediocre lab assignments. Let me lay this down for you.

I understand students have multiple classes. I understand they have multiple assignments due at a time and a plethora of other real-life shit to attend to. I get that- I fucking lived it, I get that. But here's the thing. When a student hands in an assignment, it's VERY obvious when they haven't given it their very best (I'm talking real stupid errors easily caught by literally proofreading your paper even ONCE, and major misunderstandings of what it was they even DID, and wording things so vaguely and confusingly that I don't even know if there's anything there to mark). But that's okay for them to do, they get to take a slightly lower grade and move along, and nobody gets mad at them for that.

Let's flip the tables. If I don't give my absolute very best when I'm grading, I get students hounding me about simple mistakes I made that could have been avoided with a quick review of my marking. I get students asking me why they were docked marks, which could have been avoided with me writing more comments (and just trying harder to get carpal tunnel). At the worst, I get called a picky bitch who is deliberately being unfair. I don't get to give anything less than 100% on marking, there are severe consequences for me.

You see where I'm going here?

Students get to slack off, pass the class, and move along. I have no choice but to be absolutely perfect at all times. I expect my students to give me their best effort: to read the lab manual ahead of time. To ask me questions when they are confused. Heck, even just having their work ready on time. Following formatting guidelines and simple instructions. Paying attention to me in lab. Starting their assignment more than just the night before, putting in some actual effort, and proofreading it once. And they can't even give me this.

They give me less than their very best at ALL TIMES. They give me mediocre, lackluster, don't care, and demand perfection from me in return. That is the definition of unfair. It is not fair to demand perfection of me if you won't meet me at that level. So either you give me your best and I give it back in return, and then you can complain when I slip through the cracks just as I dock you for mistakes, or you act mediocre and I don't focus as much when grading your assignment, and you don't get to complain to me when you fuck up.


"But my grade is in your hands!" bruh. It's in your hands too. Get your life right.

If you can't give your instructor your very best- you need to remedy that. Take fewer courses at a time. Switch to a program that actually matches your interests and talents- or be prepared to put in more work than everyone else that has the aptitude and interest you don't. Take time to save up money for school. Let me know when you aren't feeling well so I can give you extensions. Let me know about the accommodations you need. Take some time off, see a therapist, work with friends on assignments, ask me for help. Figure out what you need to succeed and how you can give that to yourself, otherwise you're being unfair not just to yourself, but to the instructors who have to deal with you.

It's only fair.