Monday, September 27, 2010

those darn hormones

because i can come up with no other excuse. although my sister IS bothering me a bit right now by using my mirror to check her hair for tomorrow without bothering to respect the fact that i might want some alone time at the end of a long day, it's not bothering me today. i did get home to drop off my stuff before theory and discover there's a plastic sheet with a zipper in the middle in front of my bedroom door and get a little upset and ticked, but i had to get back in the car and my parents get really mad whenever we're complaining about renos, so i couldn't really be upset otherwise they'd be like "it's not going to last forever, we can't help it, bla bla bla." well um YES YOU CAN HELP IT, you could have not chosen to do renovations. DUH. grrr. it makes me more mad than depressed, which is good, because being mad makes me a lot more rational than being depressed. yesterday was my lowest low point, as in i've never been so sad and hopeless as yesterday. that was a real scary point, and a real bad one. i was sobbing yesterday, but i think school brightened my mood, because i'm used to going to school and coming back to find out some other necessary room in the house has been torn down to plywood and will remain that way for 6 months longer than it should. plus school is where my friends are, and although they laughed at it when i told one of my friends that his life was better than mine because i have toilet paper in my closet, it made me realize how ridiculous it sounded. sure, it's annoying, but at least i still have a bed to myself. that's really all i need.
i'm a bit embarrassed about the blog yesterday, as in that was not me. that was some depressed little girl inside of me that got out somehow. the hotel and calgary and the show were all nice and neat and perfect, and i come home to THIS train wreck. i do love this house, just not the interior. it's too big and too small at the same time.
AAAAND MY SPANISH POSTER ABOUT ME LOOKS AWESOME, just thought i'd toot my own horn and throw that out there.
TOOT! lol. there is something so wonderful about little-kid bad words. like toilet. heehee! we had that on a spelling test once. we were all killing ourselves laughing.
I STILL CANNOT FIND THAT CUTE KNORRS COMMERCIAL ON YOUTUBE. the one with the little timer? i LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE that commercial (not enough Os there, come to think of it) so much but it's so new that it's not up on the internet yet. the knorrs site was no help. they don't have ads there.
could it be, they're... humble???
no, actually, they had all these ads for "try this recipe because it has less sodium!" well, actually, the salt we put in food is not just sodium, that's way too reactive. it's sodium chloride, NaCl. sillies.
although i suppose "25% less sodium chloride!" doesn't have the same ring as "25% less sodium!" why not just put "25% less salt!"? anyone who's taken grade nine science will know the less sodium thing is a fail for them at sounding scientific.
FAIL, KNORRS. FAIL.
yeah.
SOOOO.... i should probably go to bed now, because all the girls in the house are probably going to be using the bathroom in mom's room, which means getting up any later than 6:30 is not an option.
yeah. and, for the record, if anyone out there that i know read the last entry, do me a favour and don't mention it in public, please? the last thing i need is people overconcerned about it, because when that happens and they try to talk to me about it i remember what it was like and cry again. not good for my case. i'd appreciate it. thank you :)
yer pal,
swegan >:\
p.s. EERMFIE'S BACK!!! >:\ YAY!!!

Sunday, September 26, 2010

NEW!!! from hell.

let me tell you something, before i even say anything else. clear your mind, please, and accept what i'm about to say.
your life is better than mine.
now, remember what i said about you being clear-headed.
unless you have no home, no education, no parents, no food, or no friends, there is no way your life can be worse. there is, in my room, in a random selection designed to give you the true torture that is renovations:
-tylenol for arthritis (closet)
-three and a half 12-packs of toilet paper (other closet.)
-4 real candles that are gross and have been in the bathroom for forever
-two large stacks of towels (bath towels and beach towels) on garbage bags on the floor behind me by the mirror.
-more hand and face towels on top.
-toilet bowl cleaner in my closet.
-aveeno soothing oatmeal bath mix stuff, for chicken pox, which has affected NO ONE IN THIS FAMILY FOR LIKE 10 YEARS
-Alleve. which, again, is arthritis medication
-cold syrup (when do i ever get sick?? WHEN??)
and that's it.
it might come in handy, you know. if i AGE PREMATURELY and get arthritis early, get a sudden cold, and have horrible diarrhea leading to me needing to shower all the time and use lots of toilet paper and towels.
WHO WANTS TO TRADE LIVES???? 'cause really? yours is better.
my sister, also, has all this glorious, lovely empty space and non-clutteredness in her room but i'm sheltering most of the crap anyways. i'm still trying to accept the way the world is consistently unfair like that, always favouring my stubborn sister. i said that she had more room, and she got all sarcastic and snarky and was like "uh, no!" which is a TOTAL OUTRIGHT AND BLATANT, BIG, FAT LIE!!! she has heaps of room since we haven't gotten her a desk yet, and she still hast two of my shelves stuffed with her crap. she could easily take the toilet paper or the towels and still have her room look twice as neat. my room is crap. i hate it. and my sister's just gone back to her usual routine of walking in whenever she's bored to talk to me, not knocking at all. the only one that knocks is dad, since he has to. i'm too depressed to talk to her. because what will happen is she'll get mad, and i'll hate myself and go back to my room and cry and then sleep.
i guess my mom's life is worse, though, what with her having to deal with all the renos and pack up the master bedroom all day. although she does watch lots of tv every night because she's always tired and needs to unwind. it's a good thing i'm on top of my homework, otherwise i'd be in really bad hell here.
THANK GOD MY BIRTHDAY IS NEXT WEEKEND. i've made my parents promise to take me out to the cabin. i love love LOVE it out there in the fall, and it's organized and neat at the cabin. no renos there, though that's not going to last long. stupid unfinished basement. my parents are adding like another three bedrooms down there, along with a bathroom. grrr. i'd like a normal life for just a year, please. or two. GOD, ANYTHING AT THIS POINT!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!
and the really depressing thing is knowing that i'll be long gone to university before they're finished. i'm never going to know the sweet happiness of just getting to have a normal house and a normal life again until i buy my own house and then renovate that.
WHY DO WE NEED TO MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER, HUH? WHY ISN'T ANYTHING GOOD THE WAY IT IS?
why didn't they think of this earlier, like when i was ten? then it could have been done by now. we'd have a nice, normal, clean(ish) house. whereas right now it's a horrible hellhole that i hate. or at least, that i've come to. i used to love being at home. now? please, let's go to school. at least i can be normal there. because at least, at least, they did renos at school long before i got there. thank you, school.
and then i'm just going to sit here through it all and cry like a big fat baby. if my parents knew, they'd be frustrated with me for not growing the eff up already and just leaving it all bottled up inside like they do.
oh yeah. and this jerk on the highway today was tailgating me when i was passing a semi, and when he got passed he flipped me the bird. thanks. really, dude.
guys, listen please, and don't ever flip anyone the bird when you're driving, okay? please. you never know, it might be a brand new driver who still barely has any idea what they're doing, and is only going slow to save your life. be thankful. because the chances that it is a young teenager trying not to hit you and hit the semi and die are pretty good these days.
i'm sorry no i'm not. he was being a jerk. end of story.
i'm at a real low point here. really low. like i just thought how i wouldn't have to deal with any of this if i killed myself. but, i don't have the courage to do that, it's overdramatic, and my friends and family would miss me too much. plus, i feel like i have something important to do in the world, for whatever reason, so i'm thinking i should probably stick around. and i'm just really upset right now. i don't want to be rash or stupid. plus it's just not me to think like this. and i don't like it at all.
it has to end eventually, right? it can't last forever, right?
in a bit of good news in my current sea of sorrow, my parents took us to Mamma Mia in Calgary last night, and it was amazing. i loved it so much, and i am so glad they took us. i didn't think it would be much fun, but it was. if i could be anywhere right now, i'd be there, watching it again. it was good to get out of the house, too.
i'm going to go turn on my fake candles in an attempt to breathe deeply and relax myself enough to sleep peacefully.
deep breath in. deep breath out.
if you read that, thank you so much. i really appreciate someone who's listening to all of this, because you know what? that's all anybody needs. someone who listens. someone who tries to understand.
someone like you guys.
-swegan

Friday, September 24, 2010

IT CAN'T BE THE END!!!

you know how you get used to doing something every day, and then all of a sudden... BAM! change!?
i hate that feeling. why? because my piano friends (lol, that's what i'm gonna call them because i've known them since i was 5 and now they're taking piano lessons right after us so we get to stay there and talk to them for a half hour every monday GIRL TIME YAY!) think i'm done growing. WHAT??? i'm still 4 inches shorter than my mom! i can't be DONE!! are you crazy?? but y'know, then again, some people only grow to 5'1.
:( i'm too short!!! i want to be taller! I WANT TO BE NORMAL!!!!
because if i was a normal height, i think life would just be perfect.
i've always accepted being small, until now. being small was cool as a kid, when you could crawl into small spaces and where clothes that weren't from the teenager stores. i'm not even a small at old navy!!! there is no way i'm DONE.
although i suppose a lot of people are jealous of me and my tininess. WHAAAT?? i don't fit into ANYTHING. even my jeans i'm wearing right now, pretty much the smallest size there is for grownups, are too big (well, widthwise). i can't go through the rest of my life wearing belts and buying slims and XS!!! it's not fair!
you know how little kids always want to grow up and be big? be cool, like the older kids they see? yeah. that was me (until i was 10, and all through middle school i didn't want to grow up.). i'd always dream of me being a mom one day, a normal mom who wore normal sized clothes, not EXTRA SMALL!!! like small, medium, AT LEAST. or a normal teenager. you know the teenagers you see on TV? they're not teenagers. they're 30. which pisses me off, because here i was looking forward to looking just like them and all the other teenage girls i've seen in REAL life. grown up. but i still look like a 7th grader, apparently. two years ago, i looked like a FREAKING THIRD GRADER!!! i was in 8th grade when that happened! ugh. my parents are all like, "now when people hear you talk, they'll think, what a smart little girl!"
the only good thing that comes of this is that i'll be able to trick-or-treat until i'm 21. no lie. FREE CANDY!!! who's going to pass up on that? if you can reap the rewards, REAP 'EM!!! it's not gonna hurt anybody to give out a few extra fun-size smarties! (which are cheap, btw, because there's like 5 smarties in the box. woop di do.)
so now what i'm trying to do is accept that everyone's always going to tower over me for the rest of my life. my sister's taller than me. she's not done growing.
it's just not fair!!! i'm not tall enough yet!!! i'm not even two inches behind my mom! i want to be her height at least. she's average-tall. i'm average-short.
GOD. i thought i was supposed to be her almost-carbon-copy, not a MINIME!!!
:( this is depressing. although i did have some growing pains the other day. YAY, YAY, HOORAY!!! there's more to come! and until then, i'm just going to keep drinking milk.
biologically, i should be done though. or close. so unless i hit one hell of a growth spurt now, i'm going to spend the rest of my life as a shrimp.
also, the worst part about finishing? is that now, i'm afraid i'm going to start growing OUT instead of UP. which is basically my worst nightmare. i don't want to lose myself.
sigh.
in other news, today was a very good day at school, though it only made me more confused (that was math. and it wasn't the math that was confusing me. algebra? pfft. easy.) first period was spanish, and on fridays we watch a spanish movie. so we FINALLY finished watching Mulan (in spanish. that's right. not subtitles. it was in FULL BLOWN SPANISH.) today and then she put in zorro. ugh. that movie makes no sense. but at least it wasn't nacho libre. i absolutely LOATHE that movie. it's not that i loathe jack black. it's just, the story, and that stupid music... "i am, i am..... i am i am....... i think i am...." GOD. who did the score for that? BECAUSE THEY DID A TERRIBLE JOB. but anyways. zorro reminds me of my grade seven spanish teacher, who is evil. i'm the only one out of that class who still thinks that. everyone else likes him.
he was evil. in a friendly way. but evil. not like he was strict or mean or anything, but he was evil. if you know what i mean. he didn't give us loads of homework. but he was evil. he'd always pretend to do mean things. and we'd laugh. and say he was evil.
evil...
yeah. but it doesn't make any sense either. and then it was math. and in math we got our tests back. i got the bonus questions, boo yeah! 89%. that's only 4% below the class average. big jump from the 75% i got on my last math test. but that was chapter one. and it was HARD. it's over now, although my math teacher keeps warning us about chapter four and how it's horrible and evil. which probably isn't a good idea. since now we're all convinced we'll fail. we won't. it'll just be hard. that's all.
anyways. so you know that guy i like.. yeah. well, he sits on the other side of the room, and if the two people across from me, in the double-aisle to my left, are sitting just right, i can see him. and today, my math teacher said something funny (maybe it had to do with the rolls? or the cake? we had an elightening discussion on her rolls. or at least she did. lol. it was funny) and then we all laughed, and OF COURSE i was looking at him. *is sheepish* but he looked back and me, and although he might have been looking at someone else, i'm going to tell myself it was me, and that gave me that feeling of a lighter being flicked on inside me again (poof! warmth) and it also made me a little dizzy. which is weird. guys don't make me dizzy. (except.... that time in the park, when my memory blanked. that was embarrassing.). and at that point i was being all depressed and thinking about how he's not my "something real" (yes, i got that from a book, but it fits so well) that i think about sometimes, and so i was thinking that, and then THE LOOK happened *is sheepish again* and then i was like aw, who cares. everyone swears once in awhile. nobody gets perfect marks in IB. (i've heard him use some words i never use behind me in science when he's not happy with how he did). not everybody KNOWS HOW TO BE SUPPORTIVE. (telling someone who's about to get braces that they suck after YOU, telling the person about to get braces, just got yours off, is not exactly helpful, fyi.) but he is funny sometimes and likes to laugh. and, as i will tell you, like a girl, he is cute. :) i am not one of the people who calls people hot. just fyi. that's not me. that's the girl to the locker on the right of mine. she's in my spanish class and thinks our spanish teacher is a cow. she (our spanish teacher) is amazing, and i really like her. just because YOU get in trouble... sheesh. some people.
and my math teacher always talks about how we must all think she's a bag. she's not. she's great. i wish she'd stop saying that. but it does make us laugh. and everytime the class laughs...good things happen.
science was easy, i got the assignment for it done in english. where we had a work period in the computer lab. PFFT!!! free time! i was on here (as you will see below) and then on typeracer.com, and then on write or die. (just google it. it's by dr. wicked). and it was fun. plus my friend who sat on my right and i watched the one semester of spanish spanish love song with no sound and whisper-sang along, since everyone else was quiet.
and here, an invention the world needs.
white-glue therapy- remember those elementary days, when making paper plate turkeys or reports of things copied from books, when you'd use that big, lovely bottle of white glue to make things stick? and remember when you smoothed the edges down, feeling the extra stuff squish out and spread evenly over your fingertip? kind of gross, but you never washed it off. and what happened next? the sweet bliss that is PEELING DRIED WHITE GLUE OFF YOUR FINGERTIP.
i suggest, for people that are stressed, to start life new, and use some white glue. (that was supposed to rhyme, after the first bit accidentally did). i suggest glue therapy. there will be a classroom of people sitting on long brown wooden tables. there will be craft projects for those that wish not to waste glue, and buckets of glue in the middle of the tables, with brushes to spread it. people can paint a thin layer of white glue on their hands, let it dry, and then focus completely on nothing but peeling dried glue off. AS MANY TIMES AS YOU WANT until there's no glue left. you'll leave feeling exhausted and you'll have honed your ability to focus.
tada! glue therapy.
yer pal,
swegan :)

HEEEHEEEHEEE

I'm a little afraid my teacher can see what i'm doing, but i don't think english in the lab is like that computer class i took in 8th grade. so yeah. i won't be on for long. And with all this typing, it probably looks like I'm writing journal entries under the persona of Clarence Norris.
HEEEEEE!!!
the kids around me now are all saying that i type really fast, and i'm freaking out the girl sitting next to me by looking at her while i'm typing. and now she just read what i wrote. and now my friend, sitting on my other side, is reading too. SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS! but oh well. as i said before, this will be short.

so today has been blissfully homework free, and i finished my book. i was hoping for a kiss or something at the end but nope, just a blank happy ending. :P yuck. it was kind of sudden, too, like i just wasn't expecting it to end right there. but it was a good book. and i enjoyed it. although i did try to hide the cover very often because i thought it was a cheesy title. The Cupcake Queen. you know me and my obsession with being real. or whatever word i use to describe it.
THEY KEEP READING OVER MY SHOULDERS. but at least now i'm not the only one who's done.
HIGH FIVE!
well. i should go do something boring now, i guess.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

BORRRRRING!!!

you cannot convince me otherwise. i am BORING with a capital B.
okay, maybe not that much, but aren't we all? and this blog especially. why am i wondering why i have no comments?
BECAUSE THERE'S NOTHING TO COMMENT ON, THAT'S WHY.
which is why, after getting inspiration to plagarize yet something else wait... no. it's inspiration, that's all. we watched julie and julia today, and it occured to me that maybed i'd be more interesting if i DID SOMETHING.
since i would not be able to cook my way through julia child's cookbook and write a blog about it, i tried to think of something else. we also watched the last mimzy today (again), and i hate how they're all talking about how special these kids are because you know what? stupidly enough, i felt jealous. everyone wants to believe they have some sort of special gift, something no one else has. and yet nothing ever happens to them, because, pal, unless you've got a whole hell of a gift there, you're not getting well-known for it anytime soon.
maybe it's because there's too many PEOPLE. we need to just... slow down. because if there's lots of people in the world, then there's lots of writers. which makes me just another run-of-the-mill word nerd. other kids get teachers calling them special too. other kids get praised for their stories, their essays, their sentences for vocabulary words, get into the advanced spelling group. they're just all in asia some other place. but they exist. i'm not SPECIAL because i can write. it's just not right to say that. lots of other kids write stuff, probably ten times better than my stuff. which kind of makes me depressed. and now i'm straying from my original point, but you know what? maybe the universe ran out of superpowers. maybe that's what happened. so there couldn't just be one writer and one painter in the world of different types. there couldn't be just one journalist brilliant beyond belief and one painter of scenery brilliant beyond belief. no. not just one person can get that. so, i think, the universe just got bored and pissed and decided to just throw them all at us. mix in a little gene-pool affectance, and tada! the world.
that's gotta be it. there's just too many of us to give everyone something REALLY special. i'm probably just like lots of other people.
but, lots of other people I WILL NEVER MEET, EVER. most likely.
which is why it's okay for grownups to tell kids you're the only person that's you. we-he-hell, guess what, kids? YOU'RE NOT. your DNA is. but somewhere else, Jimmy, is a little boy who also is good at math, just like you, and you two both enjoy legos and bananas on toast.
but then, fortunately, Jimmy, you'll never meet that little boy. and also he might die. so there you go. unique-ness.
god, i hate being a teenager. there's just too much uncertainty. i wish i could make a statement of certainty, like that boys all stink, but i can't, because trust me, they don't. a good lot of them do, but mostly they smell like... i don't know. the only three guys i've ever been close enough to smell have smelled like sweat, something really good that i can't put a name on, like cologne-y but not, and those little dryer sheets. (that would be the guy i currently like, when i got close enough to him to smell his shoulder on thursday. good-ol' dryer sheet-smelling cotton. :). and i probably smell like salt and sweat and STINK (in short, my period) half the time.
NOT FAIR! GIRLS ARE SUPPOSED TO SMELL GOOD! and i can't believe i just put what i just put in brackets on the internet.
GOOD GIRL GIGGLES! hee. i feel so bad. :)
anyways. so, what have i said?
you know you've got short-term memory loss and extreme ramble-itis WHEEEEENNNN....
but. my point was. this blog is boring. that was my point? how did i stray from that? so. it's boring. and you know what? only people whose blogs have a purpose have readers! because readers will google the subject of their blog or something and find that blog and READ IT and find it interesting that hey, someone's taking on a challenge! but what am i doing? i might as well just be posting pictures of my non-existent children for all the comments i have from strangers.
and since i can't cook or paint or sing or travel since i'm, y'know, NOT ALLOWED TO SINCE THE WORLD IS DUMB AND MEAN A LOT, i'm going to write.
really?, you say. Didn't you do that already?
yes, yes i did. BUT NOW I AM TURNING IT INTO SOMETHING I AM GOING TO BLOG ABOUT. thank you very much.
i have set my goal and even though it is TOTAL OUTRIGHT COPYING of that movie i just watched today, i'm going to do it anyways. who cares if it's unique. i thought of it MYSELF and that's what counts. i don't care if someone has done it before. i will do it myself now. because it only counts if you do it.
so. i am not going to write a novel that spans a year, because honestly? PLUGH. boooorrrrrriiiiinnnngggg! i'd get sick of that so fast. what i am going to do, though, is WRITE AS MANY FREAKING STORIES AS I CAN IN ONE YEAR.
no poems. although i should include plays. short stories, novels, et cetera. i will write as many stories as I can come January 1st, 2011. BUT in order for them to count, they must all be FINISHED. as in done, happily wrapped up (or not?) i haven't decided yet whether or not i should include previously started stories...? yeah, i guess i should. anything i finish within that time frame is countable. except if i cheat and write all of a story except for the last word... and then add the last word in 2011 and count it, yay! NO. there has to be at least one plot point left, one thing left to do in the story. it has to be finished. it does not have to be perfect. in notebooks, on the computer, on math tests in math class. whatever. it just has to be DONE and accounted for.
want to join me? okay, that's great. but i'm just going to let you know now, i am not looking for volunteers. no pressure, dude. seriously. and another thing? it's not a race. the only person i'm trying to impress is me. just. me. i don't care if you wrote 25 stories by july and i've only written 3. i'm going to be happy if i finish three by the end of the year (yes, nano and screnzy cound too). you are welcome to join, if you want to challenge yourself. not me. i am in it for me, me me me, because a) i am lamely really self-centered, don't tell me otherwise, i am a woman convinced and trying to improve myself, and 2) because challenging someone else makes it about winning and i am WAY TOO MUCH FOR WINNING right now.
the mission: 365 days, infinite stories. how close will i get?
let me know your thoughts. even if you hate it. but, can i just say...
"Don't be satan-fatin' by hatin' and not appreciatin'!"
i totally claim all copyright to that. I CAME UP WITH IT, HANDS OFF.
-swegan

Monday, September 6, 2010

I still haven't gone to eat

because i just got re-bummed that i lost my ipod when we went to vegas. i loved that Ipod. :( i think i might cry, which would be overdramatic, so maybe i won't. i just found the electric light orchestra on my itunes, and i can't add them to my ipod because either i left it (and dad's nice noise-cancelling headphones) in the rental car. or someone jacked it. i am so pissed i could cry. but hey, my birthday's in less than a month (october, baby! woot!) so i guess i'll just ask for the same ipod again. blue, ipod nano 4g. that's all I want. with the words "merry xmas (my name goes here, but that's classified) love mom and dad 06" or something on the back. that's all i need. i don't need one that can hold 5 gagillion songs. just something simple. 1000 soungs, 4g, is plenty enough for me. so that. and books. and that's about all i want for my birthday. also maybe a nice pen. then, i'm good. books are a necessity, i must have them. also, my ipod is nice on long car trips. so as long as i can get an ipod, then i'm all set for life. i have all the playlists and whatnot on my computer. it's all set. i'm just angry that someone stole it. or that it's under our bed in the vegas house (my dad's cousin and her husbands). but she said she looked and it wasn't there. which just makes me angry- at myself. how could i lose it? also at the world.
now i should go to eat. it's been like an hour of golden girls i've missed reading blogs.
farewell!

I am RIGHT PISSED at movie maker

see, my sister and i are in the middle of filming this movie idea we came up with, entitled "rejected", and i was trying to add sound to the beginning. BAD IDEA. it was all slow, so i turned off the network switch on my computer because sometimes just having the internet off makes things that much faster. but it didn't work. it just erased all my hours of scrolling, selecting, and dragging and cutting that was HALF A MOVIE. because i stored the videos on the NAS server rather than my computer, right? and i hadn't saved the project, so movie maker was still counting on the NAS server to supply videos. of course, the second i switch off the network switch, i lose access to the NAS server, which you need internet to get to. so poof, all gone was the movie. i panicked and tried to flick the switch back on, but stupid dumb movie maker, useful as it isn't, didn't work. so now i'm just not going to worry about making this stupid movie until i've boiled down later and don't want to grab the program out of the computer and tear it in two with my teeth and hands, throw it on the floor, and stomp on it, then take it outside and run over it repeatedly with the truck while it screams. because if i could, that's what i'd do right now.
anyways. we started the sixth season of lost last night, but mom missed the last two episodes of season five. i was like, MOM! HOW CAN YOU MISS THOSE EPISODES??? they were SOOO INTENSE- and she FELL ASLEEP. i am not kidding. zonked out in her chair. she missed where juliet hit the bomb and everything! at least now there's no time travel and you don't have to keep track of why everyone's thirty years ahead or thirty years behind with the dharma folk. they still haven't told us what the dharma initiative was. i demand to know! or why richard is all weird. or where the hell jacob came from. all these unanswered questions. also, how the creepy guy who wanted to kill jacob but was his friend became locke and the smoke monster... when locke's dead. makes 0 sense. but anyways. now i have to put "LOST SPOILER ALERT" in the title. because i wouldn't want people who haven't watched this yet to have it ruined for them. because trust me, you don't know nothing about jacob or richard or the dharma initiative in the first season. you know the others, the monster, and that's it. you don't even know DESMOND in the first season.
okay. now it's time for lunch. mom and amy have been waiting forever, and they're watching golden girls without me. for shame!
yer pal,
swegan :)
p.s. remember when i asked where the cute distracting guy was? well, he's in my cores this semester...